List of things to do before I go to London...

I have a list of jobs to do before I go to London to meet my wife and children on Wednesday after work.

1. Clean the kitchen floor
2. Phone Alistair about paper round
3. Do the dishwasher a few times (remember to use as few dishes myself to cut down on dishwashing (and be kind to the environment, obviously))
4. Tidy the living room
5. Tidy the bedroom
6. Pack my bags to go to London
7. Remember to take Heathers make up bag
8. Go to work on the train
9. Phone about a new car
10. Socialise with my mum and dad (probably around tea time)
11. Watch "Casino Royale" on DVD
12. Watch "Hot Fuss" on DVD
13. Sync up and charge my iPod
14. Go and watch Everton verses Werder Bremen at Goodison

Now I have done some of these things on the list. I leave it up to you to guess which ones I have done.

People care about Chocolate

I took a lot of grief about my choice of chocolate bars for my last poll. People asked why it was Neslte and Mars no Cadburys. So I have chosen the best Gerry Anderson show for the next one.

The Clangers

I've been watching some retrospective television programmes on BBC Four recently about some sixties and seventies cult hits. Oliver Postgates The Clangers and Bagpus where featured. I can appreciate The Clangers, but Bagpuss never did it for me. I found the busybody mice annoying.

There was a look at "Blakes 7" which I remember watching as it was the same time that Stars Wars was released on the cinema.

Second time around, I was amazed at the shaky sets and the slow paced script compared to todays amazing computer generated graphics and committee written scripts.

(Warning Sally Army content coming up)

Recently, I have had the opportunity to think about our church (corps) 10, 20 years ago. Have we moved on? Do the sets wobble?

I know, as a section leader, I am always thinking about the style of worship (perhaps too much). We don't do tambourines anymore. When we sing an old style "Army" chorus I am left thinking "What was all that about?".

What are we? Seventies or sixties or eighties with Bill and Ben, Blakes 7, Renta Ghost, Wonder woman, Adam Ant, Dallas

Or more upto date with the 90s Tellytubbies, This Life, Reeves and Mortimer.

New Polls

We have a feature to create Polls now. I have tried a Poll, to see which is the best chocolate. Lets have a go.

Ford Fiesta (RIP)

Yesterday our N reg (at least 12 years old) Ford Fiesta passed away on the way home from Heathers work. It's down at the garage but they have spoken to Heather and there is nothing that can be done for it. It's done 107,000 miles, it's had at least two break ins. A couple of bumps and dents (we don't notice or count them anymore).

Its engine has finally ceased. I'm looking at the train and bike now for work.

We are all a bit sad :(

(I think Alistair will be sadder when he finds out, I think he was counting on learning to drive in it)

I will try and find a picture to post here.

Bankrupt tooth fairy

Matthew (aged 7) went to hospital yesterday to have some teeth taken out (something to do with his bad parents giving him too much to eat, probably). In the end he had nine taken out. I was more nervous than anybody else, I didn't like the fact he was given a general anaesthetic. I'm sure my mate Will would tell me not to be so stupid and it happens every day. But as I am now "all counselled up", I need to recognise that my feelings are just as valid as his dismissals.

Or am I misrepresenting you, Will. Go on give me some statistics.

Two Drifters

(Warning Sally Army content)

We have a large community programme at our Corps. The premises is used by adult learning services as an outreach centre for the local community. We are always trying new ways to get involve. Tomorrow (Thursday) we are holding a end of term celebration for people who have passed their courses. (Heather is getting her certificate for Counselling).

As a corps we are providing musical entertainment. Mary (sister in law, not mum) has set up a small singing group, and we have been practising hard for our "Big Night". As well as Army favourites (Moment by Moment, O Happy Day, This Little Light) we are singing some music written by (Major) Burt Bacharach, "What the World Needs Now" (Once you start singing it you will be singing it for days). (Colonel) Henry Mancini "Moon River".

The group consists of Glyn (piano, with comedy bandage on finger of left hand), Alistair (drums), Mary, Jenny, Lynsey, Heather, Jeanette, Neil, Peter and Me. The problem we have is we can't get through "Moon River" without giggling like kids. It is something to do with the line "Two Drifters" and the fact that Peter held Neils hand when they first started to sing it.

We have resorted to singing this song with our heads stuck in the books. We know if we look at anybody else it will end in tears.

Anyway it will be a great night.

Watching in a super market

(Warning Sally Army content)

I have spent an hour and a half collecting for Red Shield at my local Morrisons on Friday evening. I spent my time watching the people who shop.

One lady approached the internal shopping gates so slowly that they failed to open. She waited until somebody more mobile passed her into the shop.

Another Grandma used the shop motorised wheel chair. As she passed me I noticed it had a "flappy" control like the one used in Formula 1. The similarity didn't end there, she went through the shop with the same abandonment as Lewis Hamilton at Silverstone (always taking the racing line, regardless of ankles and toes).

Several people chose the entrance to the shop to pause and look at their lottery ticket. They usually stopped in the most congested part of the shop, causing a queue of people behind them. But nobody ever asked them to move on, they usually just "tutted" loudly and waited impatiently for them to move on.

It did make me consider my "technique" for box collecting. Should I:

Always look into the mid distance so trying to make it easier for people to walk past me if they don't want to give.
or
"Eyeball" them as they put their change in their purse when they are at the tills.

Thank everybody profusely. Especially people who give less than 20p.
or
Save the thanks for the people who give more than 20p.

Make sure I give people plenty of room to walk past me.
or
Get in their way so they have to say excuse me or give me money to get out to their cars.

Concentrate on people leaving the store thus ignoring people entering the store.
or
Ignore everybody in the store.

Hope I get a low amount of money so they don't ask me again.
or
Realise I have no control over how much I collect and they will always ask me as my mum and dad are running the appeal.

Listen to my iPod.
or
Smile at everyone leaving the store whilst whistling Army tunes.

Be cynical about the store advertising when you are there long enough to read the small print.
or
Thank the store and security guard for allowing you to collect in their store.

Try and keep a count of the money going into the tin. Then give up after £3.25
or
Accept defeat before starting.

I know where you live!!!

I have installed a new feature to my web site that gives me all sorts of data about the types of visits to my website. Google Analytics.

It tells me how you arrive at my blog (mainly from Heathers). How long you stay here. How many people are new to the blog (well you all are at the moment, because it has just started to collect data)

And where you live!!!!

Well what continent you live on. So come on America, Africa, Asia, Australasia. Europe is beating you hands down.

A walk in Worthing

(Warning Sally Army content follows)

We had the visit this weekend of Cardiff Canton Songsters (Choir). They did a concert on Saturday night and led worship at our church on Sunday. At the same time Worthing Band visited Southport Corps down the road.

A couple of years ago I was invited to go with Blackpool band to Worthing, to help them out for the weekend. Before the Saturday night concert myself and a couple of the lads went for a walk on Worthing promenade. One of the Blackpool lads said to me "What's that funny smell". I must admit I didn't recognise it (but it was unusual).

"That's the smell of donkeys" he said. And he was right, on the beach was a couple of donkeys giving rides to kids.

Now that's a specific, unusual skill, to recognise the smell of donkey mess. And can only be possessed by someone who lives in Blackpool. (not Southport, they don't have common donkeys in Southport its a bit posher there)

I don't know what smell I would have recognised, a lad from Liverpool, but it definitely wasn't donkeys.