Hair

We were discussing going to the barbers the other day. I know it's so different when ladies go to the hairdressers, its much more of a social event (they have cups of coffee and everything). There are fewer choices when I go and get my hair cut.

They always ask "What do you want?". They may think I am taking the mickey if I say something like "Can you cut it shorter". I always remember the barber here has so much power, hair grows extremely slowly and they don't seem to be short of customers. So I don't feel in a position of strength, to make some sort of Smart Alec comment. So I always fall back on "Can you tidy it up, please". Which I suppose means "Can you cut it shorter".

But there comes the time when they do give you a choice. And that is "Square or tapered?" Now for a time, I was not always sure what is meant here. So I always said "Square". I have recently changed to "Tapered, please" and I can't tell the difference. So I am thinking perhaps I should ask for tapered on one side and square on the other, but Neil thinks people will look at me strangely.

Perhaps I should go for the more female approach and when the barber asks "What do you want?" give him a picture of Tom Cruise and say "Make me look like him". I bet you will be able to hear the laughter across West Lancs. So it will be "Can you tidy it up please."